when i was in middle school nickelodeon on directv broke and it froze on the same frame for five hours. which would not have been so bad, except it was during the episode of spongebob where he goes to live with the jellyfish. specifically the scene where he’s naked and covered in sea urchins and flopping all over the place trying to get them off. and it froze on the frame where spongebob was facedown on the ground, naked. so he was laying there like that in complete silence for five hours. we would change the channel back every so often to see if he’d gotten up, but he was still like that when we went to bed. none of my friends had directv so when i asked them the next day they hadn’t seen it, but my brother and i were pretty convinced that spongebob was dead.
“No? I’m afraid you won’t have a choice in the matter.”
“That should do it!”
“Now, now. Don’t be afraid.”
“I’m only here for your life.”
But… I bought Skyrim… Twice…
Buy it again
I don’t have any money, Mr. Howard.
Well, im sorry but you leave me no choice. Id rather not do this so im giving you another chance to buy The Elder Scrolls: Skyrim™ Remastered Edition. Its Skyrim in a whole new dimension!
I just need to get my paycheck, and then I’ll buy it, I swear!
It says here that you bought groceries this week. If you hadnt you could use that money to buy an incredible experience that is worth infinitely more, and it just works
I can’t play Skyrim if I’m dead, Todd.
Really fool? I’ll have Skyrim: Special Edition ported to hell by this October, this one’s free
And who says I’m gonna go to hell?
Mere bullets cannot stop me, mortal. Either bend to my will or you will suffer endlessly in my divine fire
You revealed your true form far too early, Howard.
And I have yet to even start powering up!
First, I shall pause you in time!
And then,
This is no ordinary gun, Todd. Take a closer look.
I shall absorb your company into Electronic Arts and bleed you dry! Your fate shall eclipse that of Mass Effect in terms of severity!
FOOL, YOU THINK THAT BETHESDA MATTERS TO ME? THEY WERE ONLY A TOOL TO FURTHER MY PLANS. YOU WILL BURN!
KNOW MY WRATH MORTAL
> mortal
He thinks I’m a mortal!
You have no clue who you are dealing with, Todd!
I have more power in my nose hairs than you do in your entire body, Todd!
You have one chance to earn your continued existence. Announce or release a game that isn’t Skyrim or Fallout 4 at the next E3. I shall be waiting for you there.
y’all did a whole RP on my post this is the funniest shit